6 Questions You Need To Ask If You Are Considering Divorce

Two of the biggest life decisions that most people have to make are deciding whether or not to get married and, later, whether or not to get a divorce. There is no shame in it: half of all adult Americans get married at some point in their life, and half of all American married couples get divorced. Having said that, divorce is still just as major of a life decision as getting married in the first place, and should be treated with the same care and consideration.

If you are considering divorce, you might not want to just jump into it on a whim. Here is our list of 6 questions that you need to ask yourself if you are thinking about getting a divorce:

Are You Being Valued in Your Relationship?

People naturally change over time: sometimes they grow closer, and sometimes they grow further apart. A good starting place is to seriously examine whether you are being valued by your spouse within your relationship. Are they meeting your emotional needs? Are they sharing your values? Are they empowering you to be the best version of yourself?

What Does Your Life Look Like Without Your Spouse?

Divorce means a significant change in your day to day life, your finances, your living situation, and your social life. Take the time to imagine what your life would be like without your spouse in it whatsoever. Are you happier? Are you lonelier? Are you more free? Are you open to another relationship in the future?

How Will Your Spouse React?

Some couples argue for decades before getting a divorce, and some never once discuss their feelings. If you have spoken to your spouse about the concerns that are leading you to consider divorce, how did they react? Did they listen to you and make you feel heard? Did they make any substantial changes? If you have not yet spoken to them, do you feel that you can? Are you afraid of how they will react?

How Will it Affect Your Children?

A parent’s first thought when they are considering divorce is often of their children. Since plenty of spouses are children of divorce themselves, they know the emotional stress it can cause. Make certain to remember that having parents in a destructive marriage is often even worse for children than having divorced parents. You know your own children better than anyone else does, so consider how they will react and how you could make things easier on them.

What Preparations Can You Make?

Certain things that are important in a divorce, such as making copies of your spouse’s financial records and legal information, are much easier before you let your spouse know that you are serious about getting divorced. Speak to your lawyer to know what will help your case, but consider doing that before you and your spouse leave each other’s lives for good.

What is the Next Step?

Once you are certain that you need to get a divorce, you have already done the hard part. Taking the journey from here is much easier after you’ve taken the first step. Contact Sunshine Isaacson & Hecht, LLP today to speak to someone who cares and to get started on your path to freedom. It all starts with a call!

Getting Divorced? Think Before You Tweet

Writings on Legal Matters

Getting Divorced? Think Before You Tweet

{2:45 minutes to read} If you’re going through a divorce, it’s probably best to start with the presumption that anything you tweet, post, upload, chat about, or otherwise place in the universe of social media can and will be used against you by your spouse and their attorneys. So tread cautiously and be mindful of this problem that comes with getting divorced in the twenty-first century.

Consider the following two scenarios:

Scenario 1: Harry husband, who happens to be going through a divorce, lavishes expensive gifts upon, Sally, his significant other. Sally takes to social media, tweeting just how generous Harry happens to be. Somehow, Harry’s soon-to-be ex-wife, Wendy, gets ahold of these tweets, and forwards them to her attorneys to be used as evidence in their hotly contested divorce proceeding. Wendy’s and her attorneys’ intent is to demonstrate how Harry wasted marital funds on someone other than her and their children.

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4 Pieces of Bad Divorce Advice That You Should Ignore

Writings on Legal Matters

4 Pieces of Bad Divorce Advice That You Should Ignore

Isn’t it funny how people only ever have nice things to say about marriages, but when it comes to a divorce, everyone has their own unique opinion to share? It makes it worse that everyone seems to think they are an expert in divorce. At Sunshine Isaacson & Hecht, LLP, we help people work through divorces every single day. The only expertise we know for certain is that no two divorces are alike.

We know that it can be tough to move past what other people are saying to you, especially when those people are important in your life. Sometimes it’s best just to trust your own instincts. Here are 4 pieces of bad divorce advice that we have heard before and think you should ignore completely:

Stay Together For the Kids

It has been proven that children growing up with resentful parents have much harder upbringings than children growing up with divorced parents. A divorce is an opportunity to teach your children about personal responsibility, as well as to deepen your personal relationship with them. Anyone who thinks that “staying together for the kids” is a better option than splitting up is not considering the reality of the situation.

Mom Will Get the Kids

Maybe it was true at some point that Judges always gave mothers custody over fathers unless the mother had substance abuse issues. At this point, it’s just an antiquated and irrelevant stereotype. Your gender has no real bearing on your chances to get custody of your child or how hard you should fight for that opportunity.

Don’t Feel Sorry For Yourself

Suppressing your emotions is one of the most dangerous things you can do during a divorce. Divorce is an emotionally traumatic time, and you need to feel everything in order to move on. Closing yourself off from an emotion you are naturally feeling (or “feeling bad for yourself,” as your grandfather might call it) will only make things worse for you down the line.

You Can Do It Yourself

Perhaps the most dangerous bad advice about divorce is recommending that someone be their own attorney in a family court. Going through a divorce trial without a trained attorney advocating for your side is a surefire way to lose what you are focused on. For professional help with your divorce, contact Sunshine Isaacson & Hecht, LLP today. We have the knowledge and experience that breeds success, and we fight for you!

Your Business Could Be in the Middle of Your Partner’s Messy Divorce

Writings on Legal Matters

Your Business Could Be in the Middle of Your Partner’s Messy Divorce

{5 minutes to read} If your business partner is going through a divorce, their spouse may be entitled to compensation for direct or indirect contributions to the business.

The divorcing spouse has the right to argue that their direct and indirect contributions to the business attributed to its growth and success, if they can prove it. However, before even getting to the point where a judge determines whether the spouse made such contributions, the spouse will want to find out how much the business is worth—so that he or she knows what is at stake and whether it is worth fighting for. (more…)

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